I’ll tell you a little secret but first some back ground information……..
I’m very persuasive (don’t have a successful career in sales for nothing) , I’m very determined and I pretty much always get my own way, especially when it comes to W. There is something I’ve started thinking I really want. Not just for me, but for W and most importantly for Ava too. This idea came into my head a few weeks ago and I’ve been unable to shake it off since, in fact, the more I think about it, the more appealing it becomes, the more it seems like a really good idea. The thing is, W is not keen on my new, wonderful idea. But, I have started using my powers of persuasion on him and I hope to have him not just surrendered to, but totally in love with my idea before the year is out. Its very important we be on the same page by the end of this year, you see, my idea will need to be kicked into action early next year if its to be at all. And its not something I can do with out him.
So what is my wonderful idea?
I want another baby! I want a second child, I want a little sister (very specific I know) for Ava. I want her to grow up with a special sibling close to her. Just about everyone I know that has a same sex sibling has the most unbelievably special bond and relationship and I want that for my little darling.
So, the plan, as it currently stands in my head, is to contact our SW’s early in 2011, update our profile and get back onto the waiting list for another little baby. Except this time I want to be specific, I want a girl, I want Ava to have a little sister, somebody that’s close to her.
In preparation, I’ve done two things, unleashed my powers of persuasion on W. Initially he was all HELL NO! The first 8 weeks were still too fresh in his mind and he couldn’t face having to go through that again. So initially he was very verbal in his disagreement, but as time has gone on, he has become less verbal in his disagreement and now we’re at the point where when I talk about it, he goes: Mmmm. And he has even conceded that I do have some valuable points in my persuasion roster.
Secondly, I have gone to our local plastic warehouse shops and purchased a bunch of those seal-able 90L plastic storage bins. So far I have one completely filled up just with Ava’s new born clothes and all the really small bottles and teets for 0-2 months. I’ve started filling the second one, as she’s systematically outgrowing all her 0-3 month clothing now as well. Initially I was in two minds what to do with all the goodies. I was going to give it to one of my IF sisters because I felt that so much of what was given to Ava was so special because of the spirit in which it was given and I felt it could be a blessing to somebody else. But then I remembered before I had Ava how dead against using anything second hand I was, so I decided against that. Then I thought about donating it all to a baby shelter close to our house. But for now, in light of my desire for another child, I’m going to hang onto all the goodies and see what happens.
Of course, I don’t expect to go from adoption profile to birth in 3 weeks like we did the first time around, I reckon that would just be a little bit too greedy in terms of expecting miracles. Of course, there is also the other alternative, we never get selected again. That too I could live with, if it weren’t part of God’s plan but at least then I’d know we tried and it just wasn’t meant to be. Throughout all the years of infertility, I always maintained that I could/would be happy with just one, and believe me when I say, I totally am. But if another one were a possibility, I’m open to that too.
Edited to add: despite todays date, this is NOT an April fool.