Fatherhood seems to be having that effect on Walter. He seems to have been spending a lot of time thinking about his own life, since becoming a father. More especially, he seems to have been thinking about the impact he has had on others during the course of his life.
So yesterday morning, while watching Ava entertain herself on the carpet and sipping our morning coffee, he suddenly blurts out:
“I was a real shit!”
When I asked him what he was talking about he told me he was most concerned about raising a daughter knowing what a little shit he was as a teenage boy. How he was convinced that all parents out there must have hated him and how Ava needed to be protected from boys just like him.
He went on to tell me that he feels so guilty now, as a father of a baby girl, for all the girls he must have hurt when he was growing up. How all he was interested in, as a teenage boy, was how many cigarette’s he could secretly smoke, beers he could secretly drink and how many girls he could kiss and grope on the weekends and how this must have affected them.
He is most concerned about his daughter being exposed to boys and has gone so far as to say that she may not date anyone till she’s at least 30! 😉
Its probably a good thing then that I’ve bought us the book – Bringing Up Girls by Dr James Dobson. Because it would seem that Walter’s relationship with Ava will ultimatley shape the relationship’s she has with men when she starts growing up. Her relationship with him will give her confidence and ultimatley help her choose the right life partner for herself – one that will love, honor and respect her.
Raising children is such a massive responsibility and there are so many things to think about, things that don’t even cross ones mind while still in the trying phase.