Sjoe! After reading Chopper’s blog last night, I should NEVER have clicked over to the article referred to on the Calora Brands Face Book page. Wow, what a storm in a tea cup. And the thing that amazed me, aside from the disgusting self-important-holier-than-though-judgement was the ignorance. The people making the most noise were the ones who have never even tried it!
So what am I referring to? Ferberization or CIO (Cry It Out), which I would just like to, for the record, state that I am a firm believer in! While I realize its not for everyone and certainly not suitable for all babies, it worked like a charm for Ava and for us and we have not looked back, its the greatest gift I have given my child thus far and of course a gift to Walter and I as well. We used the Baby-Love method and it was not the violent, neglegtful, abusive process that people think it is.
My child never once vomited from the angst of being left to cry. Nor did I ever let her cry for longer than a few minutes at a time without going in to comfort her. Obviously sleep training is not something a parent does when you child is sick or teething. And each time you return to the room, while comforting them, you always check to make sure they’re not too hot or too cold or have a dirty nappy. When doing CIO, you always check on your babies comfort first to ensure that they are not crying because they’re sick, hungry, have a dirty nappy or are too hot or too cold. I think some parents forget that a babies only way to communicate their pain, fear, anger to us is to cry. I knew within days of Ava’s birth when she was crying because she was hungry, when she wasn’t feeling well and when she was angry. And trust me, the crying she did during the 2 days it took us to practice and perfect the CIO method, she cried because she was downright pissed off. Its also not a process that takes weeks or months. It took 2 days the first time and after she cut her first two teeth a couple of bad habits started forming and it took one CIO session to revert back to good sleeping habits.
In addition, I believe we are in the process of raising a very happy, confident and well balanced little girl. Ava has thrived since birth. She has met and achieved all her milestones on target and has always been a pleasant child to be around and why is that? Because she has a routine, because she knows what to expect and when to expect it, because there are no unnecessary surprises in her day. Because she sleeps WELL and regularly. She is well rested and never over stimulated or over tired and as a result we rarely ever have to deal with a miserable and difficult toddler. She certainly does not have any separation anxiety issues because she has learned that if mommy or daddy leave, they always come back.
We have been having full night sleeps since Ava was 12 weeks old! Her CIO training took 2 days and the CIO was only required for her day time naps, never at night time and was never left unattended to cry for hours on end, contrary to what some people think CIO is.
I suppose a lot of where one stands on this issue is based on the type of mother one is. I have blogged before about my mother style, and I have maintained from the beginning, especially because I am raising a girl, that I want to raise my child by being an example to her. I want Ava to know that when she is a mother one day, she is not required to be a slave to her children and that she is entitled to still take care of herself. I could never be the type of mother who has to spend hours lying in bed with her toddler at night trying to get them to sleep, or have their child sleep in their bed with them. Don’t get me wrong, if it works for you that’s fine, but its just not ever going to work for me.
And at the end of the day I can quite smugly say…. the next time one of those judgy-holier-than-thou-mothers complains about how tired they are, I’ll just smirk to myself knowing that I have a well adjusted, happy, thriving child, who has been armed with the most basic of life skills by being able to fall asleep by herself and that we are getting full nights sleep every night!