I find myself in an odd head space at the moment….
I was going to write a “Currently” post but I feel like I lack inspiration to really write anything mostly because of the jumble of thoughts in my head. So many thoughts swimming round and round in my head at the moment.
So maybe this is the place to try and verbalize them all, sort through them, discard some of them and try to move forward with a clearer vision.
Guys, sometimes I feel with the onset of our social media lives, the things that are really important to us get clouded by others (loud) opinions. There have been so many things irritating me lately…. I’m not even sure where to start, or if I even want to open the proverbial can of worms.
Maybe I’m just socially exhausted.
I find myself wanting to share less and less about my children. Especially with Ava, she’s getting older and is far more aware than she used to be, she’s also very tech savvy and I find myself listening more carefully to the social statements she makes lately. She has started moving more and more towards not wanting me to share about her online. She thinks you’re all my friends, so sweet, so innocent, imagine that were true? So if I take a picture of her, she will often ask me afterwards to not share it with all “my friends” and I respect that. I’ve always been cautious about protecting my kids online but I find myself even more so these days.
I think that’s part of the reason I have struggled so much with establishing my “brand” identity and why a lot of my blogging has moved away from parenting and leans more towards lifestyle blogging now. I’m sure this is a natural progression, our kids get older, there is less and less that is appropriate to share.
And then there is the perception of mommy bloggers out there. Now maybe I’m just sensitive (ok, yes I def am), but it does, at times, feel like mommy bloggers are looked down on by the digital community, even though I have it on good authority we are some of the top “influencers”. I’ve been thinking about this for a while now, I think it’s also part of what has made me struggle with my brand identity of late, after someone made a comment to me, in jest, granted, but you know….. Never a truer word spoken in jest… The comment was something along the lines of how I should just hush and go write something about the colour of baby poo. I think this is the reason why I was so chuffed to attend the Jameson event, somebody out there saw me as more than a one dimensional woman who sits around writing about baby poo.
And then there is the other side of things, and that is that I think often mommy bloggers get a bum rap, we are damned if we do and damned if we don’t. When you post positivity about your life, you’re fake. When you’re honest you moan too much or don’t appreciate your children, balancing that tight rope is exhausting at times, especially because for me, authenticity is everything and sometimes things are really great and sometimes, they’re simply not.
There is also “professional” (can I call it that?) jealousy and this can lead to rather unbecoming behavior. I abhor people who activiley seek our and encourage drama. Don’t do that, it says way more about your character.
Meh…. sometimes I think I should just pack it all in and forget this whole gig. I really need to learn to not take other people’s opinions to heart. Really, they are at the end of the day, just opinions and you know what they say about opinions and assholes right? And this digital sphere is full of opinions, they’re not all right, or right for me. It just becomes tiring constantly hearing how thing should be done. I don’t want to do it your way, I want to do it my way. I want to enjoy the creative process of my blog and I honestly can’t do that when my thoughts and judgement are constantly clouded by others opinions.
Or maybe I’m just socially exhausted.
I don’t know.