Please tell me I am not alone in this.
Please tell me I’m not the only one that feels guilty about literally EVERYTHING.
I have such a complex about seeming selfish and I’m so conscious of it, almost all the time, that I often battle with such terrible guilt!
I have struggled with terrible survivor’s guilt ever since Ava’s birth. I feel so guilty to be enjoying this special time while watching so many of my friends still struggling with infertility that, at times, I’ve had to turn away from them just to be able to cope with my guilt better.
I have a big mouth, which often gets me into lots of trouble, I’m not the type to hold my peace, or grin and bear it. If I have something to say, I will say it. I have to say it, otherwise the emotions behind it will eat at me until the entire situation is completely blown out of proportion. But when I do say my peace and the other person involved apologizes for it, I feel guilty about it and then I start worrying about being selfish.
How to you handle apologies? Do they also send you into an over analytical spin, all wrapped up with guilt or are you able to accept the apology, feel vindicated and move on?