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One For The Breast Feeding Nazi’s!

I’ve made no secret of the fact that because my journey to motherhood was somewhat different and a little unique, I’m often left feeling either excluded or not quite a mom by other mom’s in mommyhood.

My biggest bone of contention and the topic that causes me the most guilt, the most feelings of exclusion and the most feelings of being “not quite a mother” in the eyes of other mom’s is the whole breast feeding movement. Or rather should I say, not so much the breast feeding movement but more the breast feeding Nazi’s and believe me there are many. I’m sure all the Earth Mother’s out there would be horrified if they knew that while they consider themselves all earthy and “natural” mom’s they come across as judgmental and absolute Nazi’s to the rest of us.

And then I stumbled across this article yesterday and I loved it! Because while I totally get that it’s ok to be pro breast feeding, like anything in life, there are right and wrong ways of going about it. There are ways that are encouraging and then there are ways that leave many of us feeling judged and just not good enough and really, that’s not ok.  I’ve highlighted the ones that particularly spoke to me.

Photo Credited To Author.

One of the main reasons breastfeeding advocates are negatively judged by the mainstream media is their attack on formula feeding mothers as part of their defense. This really angers me, because I feel that some breastfeeding mothers are aiding in the attack and judgment of my family (a family that practices extended breastfeeding) through their malicious statements directed at formula feeding mothers.

Here are 10 phrases all breastfeeding advocates should just stop saying:

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11 Comments

  • Reply ovaldaze

    I couldn’t breastfeed either of my boys, I tried for 5 weeks with my eldest, it. Was hell! He has oral sensitive issues which we didn’t know about. So I stopped and he was bottle fed. Ann Richardson was his nurse (she wrote those books on sleep) and she said ‘Happy Mommy, happy baby’ that was all I needed to hear. Then with my youngest, I just didn’t have enough milk, so 3 weeks later, no more milk, he was on the bottle. And then some earth Mommy told me because I had a ceasar with both my boys (my choice completely) I wasn’t a real Mommy. I don’t allow these judgemental people to make me feel less of a mother because I had C-sections and bottle fed babies. My boys are amazing children, with excellent health and both are very intellegent. I always tell my husband that at least my boobs don’t sag (breastfeeding makes some boobs very saggy!) And because of the C-sections, all is working just fine down there! Lol! So I see that as win-win all the way!

    April 6, 2012 at 10:20 am
  • Reply ovaldaze

    Sorry posted too soon. So basically what I’m saying is that I don’t allow these judgemental people to get to me. I am who I am and I love my boys and they love me. We are happy, well rounded people.

    April 6, 2012 at 10:22 am
  • Reply Laura-kim Allmayer

    What a good article!!!! Maybe one day we will all just be happy to accept one another decisions. Until the I am revelling in my laziness as I feed my baby poison :)))

    April 6, 2012 at 2:24 pm
  • Reply adesolaf

    This is quite funny but very true. Do people go around asking every mom if their babies are breastfed or formula fed? I know a lady who couldn’t breastfeed because she had a fungal infection, by the time the infection was treated there was little or no milk to feed the baby and baby was already doing great on formula and didn’t even see the bo.obs as the source of food!!! What could this mother do differently (can the nazi blame her for developing an infection). Sharon you are doing a great job raising your daughter ad that is what counts and the most important consideration!

    April 6, 2012 at 3:32 pm
  • Reply mommyjesse

    Sometimes I am glad for adoption. I use to dread the questions c-section or natural , breastfeed or bottle. Although I would have like to try breastfeeding and natural birth I sure would of loved to feel ok if I chose neither for whatever reason. Why i woman so hard, hard, hard on each other. Perhaps because deep down we so hard on ourselves.

    April 6, 2012 at 5:48 pm
  • Reply Lea White

    “Breastfed babies are smarter” – Bianca was a formula baby from early on and guess what? At the age of 7 she had the reading ability of a 13 year old, she skipped a whole year at school and instead of being in Year 4 this year, she is in year 5 (in a combined Year 5 / 6 class). The other day the Year 5s were given the option to do an extra test if they wanted to do the Year 6 test along with their Year 5 test, she did and did great!

    I wasn’t able to breastfeed my kids. I tried flippen hard. And I simply didn’t have enough. So I changed to formula as I didn’t want them to go hungry. Caitlyn had very obvious signs she didn’t get enough of my milk and yet the stupid midwife / lactation specialist ignored the signs and kept pushing that I would keep at it with exclusive breastfeeding. Once in frustration (after trying for a whole hour and she still gave me the hungry signs) I did a top up and she drank 120mls. So once we were passed on to Plunket I stopped breastfeeding altogether.

    Do I feel guilty? No. My child was happy and well fed and Terence and Bianca could play a role in feeding Caitlyn.

    Did I not try hard enough? I tried. Flippen hard, but it simply didn’t work. It also didn’t work with Bianca (and with Bianca I had a prescription to try and boost my milk supply).

    Breastfeeding was what I wanted, but it wasn’t an option for me in the end.

    Was I just lazy? Sorry I have to laugh at this – it is significantly more effort to have to wash and sterilise bottles (a never ending job) and then to have to make up each bottle each time your child is hungry. If you go out you have to try and find a way of heating that bottle when they are hungry.

    Do I care what others say? No. I really honestly don’t give a stuff.

    Before you know it Sharon, you will move beyond this stage where all parents ever do is discuss breastfeeding and nappy changes and sleeping routines.

    April 6, 2012 at 9:12 pm
  • Reply Kristin

    Brilliantly said!

    April 7, 2012 at 8:50 am
  • Reply elna3

    I just love this article Sharon. I had a breast reduction and could not breast feed. I loved the whole bottle feeding thing – we got more sleep, hubby could be part of it, I could eat and drink what I wanted and our baby was perfectly happy with it. She has no allergies, hardly ever gets sick( the breastfeed gurus say that bottle fed babies get sick more and have more allergies) and is no different from breast fed babies. With the wonderful formula milk we have today, babies are no worse off.

    April 9, 2012 at 2:37 pm
  • Reply Melinda

    Well, I breastfed after a Ceasar. And I stopped because I just could not bear the leaking breast (leaked one day during a board meeting…eeuuwww) and the smell of milk on me all the time….so I guess I was lazy and did not try hard enough and will be burden with a “not so clever” child, who I slowly poisoned with formula….smile.

    April 10, 2012 at 8:02 am
  • Reply To Love Bella

    Whoohooo!!!!! My favourite part was the bit about the arsehole! 🙂
    x

    April 10, 2012 at 8:57 am
  • Reply blackhuff

    I love that you and me feel the same about this – that breastfeeding moms can come over as nazi’s. I too did not breastfeed my children because:
    1. First child I did not lactate; and
    2. With second child I did lactate but I was not for breastfeeding. I chose not too and when breastfeeding moms hear this, I am hammered with all sorts of questions of “why not” or “how could you not.”

    April 10, 2012 at 1:38 pm
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