We are ALL a product of our upbringing.
Once of the things I’ve been thinking about recently, is how I’m raising my girls differently to the way my parents raised me. I am Generation X, my parents were Baby Boomers, their parents were from the war era (known as The Veterans). We all had a different upbringing and we all learned something from it and are trying to do better with each generation.
I’m not sure if we’re doing better.
And it will be interesting to see what my kids think, as Generation Z, when they are adults and parenting their kids.
I recently shared this over on my Face Book page and it pretty much sums up my parents, but the one that stuck out for me the most was point no. 3.
Growing up as a child of Generation X and being parented by Baby Boomers, the philosophy then was pretty much children should be seen and not heard, do what I say because I said so and if none of those worked then a good whack with the wooden spoon would sort you out.
Now, I’m certainly not criticising my parents, I’m pretty sure most Generation X’ers were brought up the same way. But what I am saying is that with every generation, we learn from the past and we try to do better, or at the very least, try to do differently.
Obviously the society we find ourselves in also plays a role. My Dad, who is a Baby Boomer but was parented by The Veterans, will tell you that his parents didn’t even know where he was half the time. And that is in part due to the parenting style of that era, in part due to the fact that the familial “village” was largely still in tact and in part due to the fact that it was a VERY different society. I’m pretty sure our grandparents, my parent’s parents, The Veterans, never had to worry about child trafficking, kidnappers and the like.
We live and are raising children in a much different time, in a much different era. Heck, some days I’d love to tell my kids to go play in the traffic (who grew up in the ’70’s and ’80’s hearing that? I think we all did) But that’s not the era we are raising children in.
Saying I’m Sorry To My Children
That is something I feel is really important to me. I want them to grow up knowing they are worthy of an apology. I want them to know that adults are not perfect, we’re not infallible and sometimes, as their mother I will make mistakes, and they deserve to hear an “I’m sorry” from me. Heck just the other day, I did a big “I’m sorry” with Hannah.
I’d had a rough day, she was being usual, typical 4 year old self, I was trying to get her jammies on her after bath time, and she was bouncing around her room and my patience quote for the day was just OVER and I lost it, I swotted her on the bum and yelled at her. She was so shocked, she burst into tears. I never smack my kids! And I really had to do some serious grovelling with a big apology to her. That was not ok, to let my bad day affect her.