Parenting…. The Chattering Monkey Phase

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Gah you guys. Do you think there is such a thing as a natural parent? Like, a person that this parenting gig just comes completely naturally too? A person who doesn’t struggle with each step of the parenting journey? A person who has their parenting shit together? 

Because it sure as hell isn’t me!

I’ve found challenges and frustrations at every phase of parenting so far. And I have no doubt I will continue to struggle and be challenged to the point of breaking, at every phase of my children’s development!

I mean, the newborn phase was the biggest shock to my system. I honestly didn’t think I would survive it. Then we went through the weaning and potty training phase and I literally clenched my jaw and white knuckled my way through that.

And don’t even get me started on the Threenagers!

But now we’ve entered the new phase. I call it the chattering monkey phase!

And there are moments during this phase where I’m not sure if I should burst into tears or just curl up in a ball and give up!

The Chattering Monkey phase – a breakdown:

  • Constant noise! Like chattering monkey’s! Whether it be the sounds of fighting, playing or talking. It’s NEVER ending. There is NEVER a moments silence and if there is, be sure it’s a sign of even bigger trouble on the horizon! 
  • Constant chatter, just like chattering monkey’s! There is never a moment where I can just be silent in my head, lost in my own thoughts or just reading a book. There is always someone saying something to me. Usually something totally random too! Like, this week, I got an entire biology lecture, from a 7 year old, about the life and times of a brown bat! It’s like having a talking encyclopedia trapped in the body of a small, cute but rather annoying monkey! 
  • Monkey antics…. all the time! Whether it be jumping on beds, hanging off the back of my couches, swinging from something or simply standing on ones head while watching TV. Why do kids to that? Stand on their heads while watching TV? I mean, I’m sitting there, minding my own business, trying to be engrossed in some kid show when a random foot connects with the side of my head! 
  • Monkey fighting! You know, pushing, shoving, slapping, punching, biting! Anything goes when the other monkey has what you deem belongs to you! 
  • Monkey logic – like why my make up has been trashed and they have smudges all over their faces? Because the dog put make up on them. I mean, I can’t even make this stuff up! And how much of a monkey do they take me for that they actually think I’d believe that? 

I love them. Oh my word I love them and I wouldn’t change them for anything, which is a good thing because otherwise I would have run away and joined the circus a long time ago!

Please tell me I’m not the only one struggling with the monkey chatter phase? 

I really have to work hard everyday to stop myself from telling them to just shut up! Just for a moment, to be quiet. I know this is a normal part of their development, I’m just not sure my sanity and my love of silence can withstand this!

Which makes me even more terrified for what lies ahead. Because I have no doubt I’m going to struggle with every phase of parenting and next up we enter the tween phase! 

Which phase of parenting has been most challenging for you? 

February 14, 2017
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19 Comments

  • Reply evatjies1422

    Every.Single.Day! I come to work for peace and quiet!

    February 14, 2017 at 8:10 am
  • Reply Anneké

    OMW … finally, Im not the only one going bonkers! My girls are 6 / Twins 4.
    Its a never ending crazy, chaos, upside down days…

    But boy when I look at them when they are fast asleep after a day of screaming, laughing & being just IMPOSSIBLE, I cannot believe that they are all mine. I love my girls so much. We have been through so much & this is simply just another day with many more to come.

    Sharon, here is to many more crazy-ass day. You are not alone.

    Anneké

    February 14, 2017 at 9:12 am
    • Reply Sharon

      LOL! Crazy… that’s the word. I’m going crazy, they’re driving me crazy, I’m crazy in love with them!

      February 14, 2017 at 10:43 am
  • Reply High Heels And Fairy Tales

    I only have one (7 years old), but we’re there too… constant chatter! And, not to sound totally annoying, but the parenting thing is actually one of the few things which did come naturally to me… until this phase, it seems! This phase is kicking my butt! And since two weeks ago, we’ve also added extreme sensitivity OMG!

    February 14, 2017 at 10:05 am
    • Reply Sharon

      Yes! The sensitivity! Don’t even get me started on that!

      February 14, 2017 at 10:34 am
  • Reply Cindy

    Not alone at all! That standing on the head thing while watching TV actually drives me freaking crazy!

    February 14, 2017 at 10:58 am
    • Reply Sharon

      Or sitting on the coffee table with filthy feet and the fighting and the constant chatter. I long for silence!

      February 14, 2017 at 12:17 pm
  • Jodi Maree-Haupt
    Reply Jodi Maree-Haupt

    Confession:
    Sometimes I whistle as I pack my bags for work.
    *Parenting shit definitely not together here.

    February 14, 2017 at 11:01 am
  • Reply catjuggles

    I am not that natural parent person at all! Sorry to say Sharon but the end it not near. I fear we are STILL in that stage at 12 and 9 – they talk my head off! And still hand over things etc – and fight. And I am starting to deal with teenage moodiness.

    February 14, 2017 at 11:25 am
  • Lee-Ann Dobson
    Reply Lee-Ann Dobson

    Twins and a older child with Aspergers Syndrome stuck at home with them some days feel like they never end but I need to stay tough for them and show them I can do even though I got the world on my shoulders I got to keep moving. Oneday it shall pass. I HAVE good days though but must add 2017 has been a CRAP year to begin with.

    February 14, 2017 at 2:44 pm
  • Reply Cassie

    Every.single.moment! I can’t even hide in the loo for quiet, she finds me! I swear I say “Can Mommy just pee in peace please?” At least 100 times a day!

    February 14, 2017 at 5:54 pm
  • Reply ella

    My son(almost 4) and nephew (almost 2) are feral monkeys I swear, they climb everything and never hush up EVAAA and when he is alone he sings constantly he is neveeeeer quiet… I love this kid but I’m def not a “built in mommy”

    February 14, 2017 at 9:32 pm
    • Reply Sharon

      YES! Hannah does the singing ALL the time too! There is just never ever a moment of silence. Ever. I miss that.

      February 15, 2017 at 8:28 am
  • Reply mademoisellenomad

    This post is hilarious! I never knew there were so many phases – love the name “chattering monkey” LOL. Not a mother (yet, hopefully someday…) but sure can learn a thing or two from your post 🙂

    February 15, 2017 at 2:03 am
    • Reply Sharon

      It’s the greatest and most challenging thing you’ll ever do!

      February 15, 2017 at 8:27 am
  • Danielle Bolton
    Reply Danielle Bolton

    Christopher John Bolton Finding it super challenging is normal ☺

    February 15, 2017 at 11:35 am
  • Reply Chan

    Lol Yes, guess it’s our turn now.
    I have new respect for my mom (we were three plus three cousins and we were loud!!)

    February 15, 2017 at 2:40 pm
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