Right Idea… Wrong Execution

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Last week I blogged about the second biting incident here. After some discussions with Ava’s school, where it was confirmed what I had long suspected, that Ava is a sensitive and a some what timid child, Walter and I immediately got to work doing some roll playing with Ava to try and help her better understand how to stand up for herself in an appropriate manner.

Melinda could never have imagined that the In The Night Garden hamper she sent to Ava would be so quickly put to good use. On Thursday night, I did an Iggle Piggle & Upsy Daisy puppet show for Ava, a little show about how naughty Iggle Piggle bit Upsy Daisy and how she pushed him away, pointed her finger and shouted NO! NO BITING!

It seems that something has clicked within Ava’s mind after she watched my rather lame attempt at a puppet show. She went to school on Friday morning and the first time one of the little girls tried to push her out the way to take over swinging the teddy and her teacher told her to say no, she got all up in this little girls face, pointed her finger & told her very firmly no. This was a great lesson for Ava because the child’s response was to walk away. Later on that day, the teacher also did a little roll playing with Ava and the little boy, Liam, who had bitten her. Again, she got her finger out and told him NO BITING.

I really had hoped that this would give Ava the confidence to keep standing up for herself. And it seems it has. This morning when I dropped her at school, Liam was there with his (non identical) twin brother. They rushed up to say hello to Ava when she arrived because she and little Liam are in fact good friends, biting aside. As soon as Ava saw the two of them approaching her, she yanked down her t-shirt to show the bite mark on her shoulder, pointed her finger, shouted NO and shoved the little guy to the ground. Unfortunately, it was the wrong little tike that she pushed to the ground, while his biting twin stood there, mouth agape at what has just happened.

So Ava got 2 lesson’s this morning. One in standing up for herself and another in saying sorry and being reminded that the only people we shove & push are the people who hit, push or bite us and not someone who’s just coming up to say hello.

Poor little guy, he’s the sensitive one out of the two and he was really upset at Ava’s show of force.

But I was proud of her. I was proud that she’s so smart as to so quickly grasp the lesson we are trying to teach her.

Now if we can get the execution correct…… so it’s a case of right idea, wrong execution.

We’ll see what transpires in the days ahead!

November 28, 2011
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7 Comments

  • Reply Charlotte

    So glad Ava is standing up for herself, Amandalynn is 5 going on 6 and we are still struggling with the lesson, where as Lorelai has no problem standing up to you whether you if something wrong or not.

    November 28, 2011 at 9:46 am
  • Reply Pandora

    Good for Ava! Leia is quick to stand up for herself, and at creche they are also taught that. If I give her a smack, she says ‘Don’t smack Mommy, hands are for loving!’ We are also teaching her to defend herself if a verbal ‘No’ does not help. So one day, the little boy that likes to bully her (not at creche) is going to get a surprise, as she will do more than just reprimand him and cry, she will push back. Hopefully that will be the end of that, as the other kids that retaliate when he tries to bully them, he then leaves alone.
    Its a fine balance, but better to teach them not to be a victim, and also to speak up if others are being bullied.

    November 28, 2011 at 10:37 am
  • Reply Jenny

    Go Ava Go! Nice solution Sharon.

    November 28, 2011 at 10:39 am
  • Reply Lesley

    That is awesome!! Much preferable to the biting back approach 🙂 Did you get the puppet show idea from somewhere and also the approach? I would not know what to do. Is there by any chance a book that you refer to?

    November 28, 2011 at 1:02 pm
  • Reply tzipieastwest

    This is such an excellent approach and your smart little girl got the lessons right so quickly !! Gives me goosebumps …

    November 28, 2011 at 4:22 pm
  • Reply Sue Stuart

    Clever girl Ava (I must admit to smiling at the thought of the scene with the wrong twin!)

    November 28, 2011 at 5:45 pm
  • Reply Sian

    Very clever. Well done Ava!

    November 29, 2011 at 4:03 pm
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