The Stupid Things People Say – Part II

Posted in Adoption Option by

stfuSo a while ago, I wrote a piece about the stupid things that people say. Well here’s another example of how having a nice big cup of shut the fuck up would have been beneficial.

Prior to Ava I was fortunate enough to be able to spend money on whatever I wanted to (including fertility treatment). I love spoiling myself and especially pampering myself. Part of my monthly routine always includes a pedicure and a session with my hairdresser. I’d have my hair highlighted, cut and blow dried every month and also buy all my products from her. Boy, she should really learn how to drink a cup of shut the fuck up.

Why? Well because I’d rather let my hair all fall out before I let her touch so much as one hair on my head ever again! Two days before we flew to Cape Town to meet our birth mum and witness Ava’s birth, I popped in at her to get my highlights touched up and have a trim and stock up on some products. I was super excited about our trip to Cape Town and about the impending birth of our child. She knows my history so I was dying to share my exciting news with her. The words were barely out of my mouth before she waved her hand in my face and told me how she believed that adoption was just wrong!

Let me start off by saying that she is of a different cultural group to me and her reaction to my news was shocking. First she told me that she doesn’t agree with adoption, that it was an issue in her culture and then when I told her how miraculous this actually was because there were so few Caucasian babies that came up for adoption, you will not believe what she told me:

“Oh I don’t agree with adoption and the reason why there are so few white babies up for adoption is because white people are cleaver!”

I felt like somebody had slapped me in the face. What on earth does being white and adopting have to do with anything? And how is having an abortion or keeping a baby you’re not in a position to raise better or smarter than giving your baby up for adoption? I was livid, it took all of my self control not to tell her where to get off and to sit quietly in the chair while she finished my hair!

Now let me tell you this, I am easily convicted about things, as an example, I saw a story on Carte Blanche a few years ago about the cruelty to chickens as the KFC abattoirs and since that day, not one piece of KFC has past my lips. Well the same thing will apply to my hairdresser! I’m tempted to phone her and tell her why she will never do my hair again and why I will not spend another cent on over priced products at her salon ever again. How I go there to have my hair done, not to listen to hair opinions!

Instead, after doing a bit of research, I’ve found a new salon to go to and a new haird stylist to do my hair.

So sometimes it really is just better to drink that cup of shut the fuck up!

January 22, 2010
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21 Comments

  • Reply Chopper1

    Jeesh!! What an inappropriate (and completely ignorant) cow. Yet again, it never ceases to amaze me that there are ppl out there who lack the ‘gene’ that makes them think before they speak!
    Glad that you made the decision not to go back to her – you don’t need that kind of negativity in your life!

    January 22, 2010 at 6:36 am
  • Reply Denise

    glad u found someone else… the narrow minded bigot really doesn’t deserve your hard earned cash. I have to say though I’ve NEVER EVER heard anything even remotely awful before that woman must have some serious issues

    January 22, 2010 at 7:17 am
  • Reply Hela

    OMW! That’s just messed up. You were right to just leave it there. Leave that negativity right there by her and don’t ever expose yourself to that again.

    Sharon, unfortunately I think you’ll still be victim to more stupid comments in the future but hopefully people will also just learn to drink that cup of STFU!

    January 22, 2010 at 7:21 am
  • Reply Julia

    I have never, ever heard something so awful and completely misguided before. So glad you found a new stylist..xx

    January 22, 2010 at 8:21 am
  • Reply Rach

    Hmm of course she is entitled to her opinion but knowing your history AND the fact that you’re a paying customer, she should have just shut up and kept it to herself.

    ICLW
    Rach
    http://www.thegalwho.wordpress.com

    January 22, 2010 at 8:21 am
  • Reply Sian

    I would tell her!That comment is from an uninformed mind! Jeez!

    January 22, 2010 at 8:57 am
  • Reply Bratty

    Holy crap…some people are just plain stupid. As a stylist she should be well aware that it is etiquette to keep your opinion to yourself..listen to the customer. I am so glad you have found another stylist…sweet revenge (silent mode) can be sooooo satisfying. And you probably find that your new stylist does a better job. Stupid cow..I hope she gets a pain where the sun dont shine..smile

    January 22, 2010 at 9:11 am
  • Reply Gwen

    Cultural differences can make things weird – but it does seem like a strangely insensitive way to behave – there’s a time and place for everything, including keeping your opinions to yourself. I don’t blame you for not wanting to see her again. It’s your bit of pamper time, and in the circumstances it’s for her to worry about cultural sensitivity, not you.

    January 22, 2010 at 9:36 am
  • Reply Nix

    The nerve!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    January 22, 2010 at 10:08 am
  • Reply Abs

    I’ll come help you set up a tea stand Shaz and we’ll serve all those morons big steaming cups of “shut the fuck up!” What an A hole!My previous hairdresser told me that infertile woman are infertile because we do not have enough faith and we do not fast before a cycle! Bloody Muppet! xxxx

    January 22, 2010 at 11:35 am
  • Reply Mash

    My mom’s gardener and his wife adopted two children, even though they had their own. So I wouldn’t say it’s cultural so much as ignorant.

    January 22, 2010 at 1:21 pm
  • Reply Jellybean

    Sharon I am so glad that you aren’t going back there! She had no business expressing her opinion when you clearly did not ask for it but was rather looking forward to sharing exciting, wonderful news. Why do people assume that you want their opinion!

    January 22, 2010 at 1:30 pm
  • Reply charne

    WTF!!!! some people are just ridicuolous!!!!!!!!

    January 22, 2010 at 1:46 pm
  • Reply Kate

    That is awful! People never cease to amaze me.

    January 22, 2010 at 3:34 pm
  • Reply Yvonne

    Sorry Shaz, I would’ve been gutted and so very hurt.
    Silly old bat. Doesn’t deserve a minute (or cent!!!) of your time!!!!!

    xx

    January 22, 2010 at 5:52 pm
  • Reply Marisa

    That’s so sad. I definitely would have gone elsewhere too!

    January 22, 2010 at 7:06 pm
  • Reply Hollie

    SHAZ!! YOU MAKE ME LAUGH SO MUCH!!! I love the “Big cup of…” And I hate that you had to deal with an idiot like that. But girl, you can put one more spin on a bad day! Im with Yvonne, don’t waste one more moment of your time with that imbecile.

    January 22, 2010 at 8:17 pm
  • Reply junebug

    Wow. That was some nerve. I would shave my head before stepping in her salon again. Ignorant is the word I think I would use. I’ve worked with families who beat or even killed their own children. Those children would have been safer or better yet alive had they been given up for adoption.
    ICLW

    January 23, 2010 at 2:29 am
  • Reply WiseGuy

    How cool of her really!!! I mean, it takes a lot of nerve to be so strangely twisted and being so convinced about it! Well, I would just go and warm her down myself if I ever came to your corner of the world. What an awful thing for her to say….and believe.

    January 24, 2010 at 8:44 am
  • Reply SCY

    Sjoe, what a pearler she is huh?

    xxx

    January 24, 2010 at 4:08 pm
  • Reply chrissy

    it amazes me all the time the comments people make about adoption, and wait untill it happens in front of your baby, then it really makes you want to do strange and twisted things to people! 🙂 so that is why basically, after being the self appointed poster child for adoption, I have stoped telling people for the most part for awhile anyway

    January 26, 2010 at 4:03 am
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