Thoughtful Thursday

The thing I love about healthy debate is that it often gives us an opportunity to learn something, if we can remember to keep our knickers untwisted and communicate like adults. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about this over the last few days and I’ve learned a number of interesting facts and lesson’s and it’s been a time of introspection too.

But one of the quick conclusions that I have come to is that when you conduct yourself in a passive aggressive manner online and stoop to the level of subtweeting and verbal back patting, it says a lot more about your own character than it does about the person you’re trying to take a dig at!

Twitter Subtweet 1


Tweet Subtweet


Tweet Subtweet 2


I’ve become more and more aware of this over the years and while I know we’re all guilty of a subtweeting, it was something I made a conscious decision not to do a few months back.  Because really, it calls to question my character and says way more about me than it does anyone else and really the biggest subtweet #fail is subtweeting someone who doesn’t follow you. Actually, subtweet is just one big giant #Fail with a capital F that I’m fast learning is reserved for those who lack the intellect to communicate like an adult.

And while its hard not to fall into the ugly of a subtweet, especially when you have strong opinions about something, I’ve learned that if I stop myself and think is this really worth it? Is it really worth making me look like an immature, school yard bullying bitch? The answer is always no and I have learnt to stop myself.

So the next time you’re tempted to participate in pack instinct and throw out a little passive aggressive nastiness in it’s lowest form, remember:

Tweet Wisely


 Images courtesy of


  • Elize

    September 13, 2012 at 8:56 am

    Ok. Wow. I had to actually look up the meaning of subtweet! (embarrassing hey?) I don’t think I’ve ever done it but now that I know what it those mean little tweets are that don’t actually mentions names, I must say I’ve always found distasteful and mean and I agree with you. You’ve stated it so eloquently!

    • Joni

      September 13, 2012 at 3:31 pm

      Hee hee Elize me too, had to hit google….

      Shaz, not sure what happened etc. But let me know if you need me to squish anyone…. I’ll be there like a bear… Got your back!


  • Julia

    September 13, 2012 at 9:11 am

    LOVE. You are sooooo right! Subtweeting says more about the person doing the subtweeting than anyone else. Can I just mention that I have NEVER EVER subtweeted anyone in my life? The thought simply hasn’t crossed my mind! If I want to engage with someone then I do it in an adult way. This is one of the reasons why I haven’t been on Twitter much in the last while.
    P.S. love Thoughtful Thursday. Has a nice ring too it!

  • Sharon

    September 13, 2012 at 9:34 am

    I tried to engage in the conversation on Twitter on Tuesday and was pretty much ignored. Its difficult to engage in a debate with someone when they have no interest in hearing what you have to say and again, says a lot about who they are.
    But I believe that I conducted myself with grace and did not lower myself to the level of subtweeting & passive aggressive Tweets and for that I feel good!

  • kerry

    September 13, 2012 at 9:47 am

    Great read. It really saddens me when people who I follow on twitter due to interesting tweets and posts stoop to this level. It makes them seem so petty and I generally lose all respect and unfollow… The worst part is that they are people within the same ‘community’ who use their perceived anonymity to attack people who have a different outlook or way of doing things. I am finding this more and more often in the ‘mom groups’, where ‘mean moms’ are becoming prevalent. Just sad.

  • TJ

    September 13, 2012 at 3:48 pm

    Yeah, I have to agree, subtweeting is just plain dumb. And yes, it proves nothing. As I said before, it only makes the subtweeter look like a fool for engaging in ‘playground’ antics.

    I have to say I’ve had to roll my eyes a few times this past week and previously when people have subtweeted. Thankfully though I don’t follow a gazillion people so I miss most of the subtweets anyhow. I’m rather picky that way. But, it seems sometimes I’m not picky enough so also do a clear out from time to time.

    I think what happened this week is as you say, no one was willing to listen to your side. I didn’t see you as attacking them, nor did I see them as attacking you. But your reasons for feeling the way you do/did are very real to you and sometimes a little empathy goes a long way.

    I guess my ability to withdraw myself from a perspective and engage another makes it easier for me to ‘debate’ and ‘understand’ another. Many, many people lack the desire or need to take on a new perspective temporarily.

    It is just a juvenile past time. And yes, I do also understand that none of us want to be disliked in a ‘community’ – but we are human and we will NEVER get on with everyone – it is just how it is!

  • Laura

    September 17, 2012 at 7:13 pm

    I am not really sure what sub-tweeting is? Is it saying stuff but not saying it? I did it during the week – I actually wasn’t up for a fight/confrontation but had to say something.

    I generally try and stay out of stuff for the most part on twitter cos it ends up going round and round – both sides feel the way they do and so the arguments just go on!


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