So Sunday is Mother’s Day…
Up until a few years ago, this was probably the day of the year I dreaded the most. It hurt, to be excluded from a celebration I wanted to be part of so badly. It was a constant reminder of how I had failed. No matter how hard I tried, I failed.
It was a reminder of how elusive motherhood was for me. It was a reminder of the babies I had lost. It was a time when pithy remarks about how I was a mother, even though my arms were empty & my heart filled with grief, hurt more than at any other time. Nobody wants acknowledges a mother of unborn dead babies. Its uncomfortable and a subject we’d all rather not broach.
And then I became a Mom, twice, by two brave and incredibly selfless women. And Mother’s Day didn’t hurt any more. I had made it. I was finally part of the “club”, I was a Mom and I got to be included in all the Mother’s Day celebrations.
With Mother’s Day just around the corner, Mom’s, please spare a thought for all the women who won’t be acknowledged this Mother’s Day. The women who long to be mother’s but aren’t. The women who are trying to be mother’s but who are battling with infertility, I assure you, this is a dread disease, that nobody want’s to talk about or acknowledge. This is a disease that not only takes a physical toll, but is a huge emotional burden to.
Spare a thought for all the Mom’s without living children. Spare a thought for all the Mom’s who never got to meet or hold their babies, taken too soon.
Spare a thought for all the birth mom’s who will not be acknowledged this mother’s day.
I will be holding Ava & Hannah’s birth Mom’s extra close in my heart on Sunday. Because without them, I wouldn’t be a mother, I wouldn’t get to be celebrated on Sunday and I wish they knew how much I will be celebrating and honouring them. Because together, only together, we are motherhood.
Irma & R, today I attended the Mother’s Day tea at Ava’s school and she’d made this but it’s as much for you as it is for me.
Motherhood is hard. It involves a ton of patience, it involves constantly having to put the needs of somebody else before our own. It involves constant chatter, noise, wiping poo bums and snotty noses, sleepless nights, cuddles and kisses and tantrums and food and feeding and worry and guilt and so much more. But it is still an incredible blessing.
Motherhood, taught me to love, completely and unconditionally. Motherhood taught me to value my own mother, how much she loved me, what she sacrificed for me. Motherhood made me who I am today.
This Mother’s Day, spare a thought for all the women out there who aren’t being celebrated and acknowledged, but who’s mother’s hearts beat strong & at times painfully, often because of circumstances they never chose for themselves.
Happy Mother’s day… Mom’s… Mom hearts & Mom spirits!