Thoughts On Mother’s Day

It seems totally surreal, but this is my second Mother’s Day! And while it was (very) different to last years celebration, it has still been a very special day so far.

Walter & Ava-Grace spoiled me with a Thomas Sabo charm to add to my collection (I got a Thomas Sabo bracelet for my 1st Mother’s day last year). The charm was chosen because Ava-Grace is obsessed with Teddy Bears, she is absolutley crazy about them and no matter where we are, whether it be one of her teddy’s or if we’re in the shops, if she see’s a teddy, she will point and say: “Teddy!!!”, so its very special and feels so appropriate for this Mother’s day.

I was treated to a delicious brunch at Toadbury Hall, which is, in my opinion, one of the most under rated country hotels in Gauteng. It is so beautiful and the food is just magnificent. We had a lovely brunch, which also invovled taking turns running after Ava-Grace as she was bessotted with the ducks and monkeys and kept running off – something I didn’t know and harshly judged before becoming a parent is that is VERY difficult to control a toddler or expect them to sit still! 🙂

But what has made my mothers day extra extra special is the beautiful sms I received from our birth mom (via the social worker) last night:

Happy Mother’s day to a Very special mom whose fulfilling our dream. I wish you could see yourself the way I do…..there are so many things I wish I could tell you, but I love you for all that you’re doing for me…thank you. Have a super day. Love ….., kisses to our baby Ava-Grace, love her Tummy Mummy…xxx
And big squeeze for Walter just because I think he’s great!

I was so touched by her very special words and wish that I could see her, wish that I could show her how well Ava is doing, she should be so very proud of our beautiful little girl. My mind has wandered back to her constantly the whole day today. I’ve been thinking about how her and wondering how painful today must be for her. Walter, in deep thought, said in the car on the way to our brunch that he wonders if she will every know what happiness she has given to us and after thinking about it, there is only one answer, if she thinks about the depth and breadth of her pain and makes that a polar opposite, then she will know the depth and breadth of our joy!

Her message also got me thinking alot about how we celebrate and view Mother’s day in such a conventional way when there are so many unconventional mothers. I wonder if she recieved flowers or a gift today? I wonder if someone is taking her out for a nice meal to celebrate her?

To all the unconventional mothers – surrogates, birth mom’s, dead baby momma’s – thoughts and prayers are with you today.

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