What I Don’t Want

On my journey to parenthood, I’ve spent a lot of time focusing on and thinking about the things I want to achieve on this journey. I’ve blogged about the growth I’ve achieved/am achieving, about how I’ve become a deeper, more thoughtful, more sensitive person along this journey, but in the last week or so, I’ve also been thinking alot about the things I don’t want, there are a lot of things I don’t want to have happen to me on this journey:

  1. I don’t want to ever forget this journey and what I’ve learned
  2. I don’t want to forget the pain of this journey
  3. I don’t want to become one of those women who forget how painful infertility is & brushes off the pain of others or becomes so self absorbed that all I can think about is what about me?
  4. I don’t want to be so all consumed in my own pregnancy that I forget about my IF sisters and their hurts and needs
  5. I don’t want to become one of those women that thinks that everyone who doesn’t show 100% interest in her pregnancy all of the time must either be jealous or not a very nice person
  6. I don’t want to be flip about others pregnancy announcements or negative treatment announcements
  7. I don’t want to dispense assvice, like was dispensed to a friend of mine who was told the reason she’s miscarried was because she was incapable of feeling truly joyful for others pregnancies
  8. I don’t want to be so conceited as to think that I’m deserving of this blessing anymore so than anyone else.

What are some of the things you NEVER want to forget?

9 Comments

  • stacey

    February 16, 2009 at 6:31 am

    These are all excellent points. I especially agree with #3. Very insightful and well put, Sharon. I can’t imagine you ever becoming “one of those” ladies!
    I think this is a really great forward-thinking post.

    Reply
  • Lea White

    February 16, 2009 at 8:21 am

    And that is where blogging is just so great, it allows us to look back and learn from where we came and prepare us for where we are heading.

    I think this is such a wonderful post and just shows what a wonderful person you are!

    Reply
  • Michelle

    February 16, 2009 at 9:50 am

    Great post yet again Shaz.
    I certainly don’t want to forget the wonderful, strong woman I have had the pleasure to meet along the way. What a way to meet friends? But I would like to think that they will be friends through thick and thin.

    Reply
  • janin

    February 16, 2009 at 10:36 am

    I dont think you could ever be any of those things sharry! I dont think that someone who has been through as much as you have and who has also committed it to writing could ever suddenly become what you dont want to. I know when you reach your dream you will be as grateful and happy as you are expecting to be and it will be continuous forever!

    Reply
  • Hollie

    February 16, 2009 at 10:53 pm

    Oh boy did you just get a big ole fat YES! from me! You hit the nail on the head with this post. I whole heartedly agree with every one. I’ve been thinking heavily myself about #8 lately. When I went into the RE office the other day, greeted with hugs, one nurse said, “You deserve this”. Which REALLY HIT ME HARD. I haven’t let it go since then. I shall post about it, but my overall feeling is that NO ONE “deserves” IF and NO ONE “deserves” the miracle of a child. We simply aren’t worthy, none of us. We just have to accept blessings as they come and rejoice that this is the journey we have been through. I am most definitely a different person than I was 5 years ago when I started on this journey, but I’m proud of the progress that I’ve made as a person and we’ve made as a couple. I really feel that this is the way that it was supposed to be for us. I don’t know what the future holds, but I can guarantee that there have been no sighs of relief over here. In fact, the worrying has really only just begun. I will always ALWAYS battle IF! I will wear my badge with honor, because I’ve been blessed already, child or not, in so many ways.

    Reply

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