It’s Feature Friday, which means it’s time to be inspired by another fierce, fearless, fabulous, forty something year old and today we meet Heather!
Heather is 43 years old and makes up one half of the power house that is South African Mom Blogs! But she can also be found here:
How do you feel now that you’re in your forties?
I’m feeling good. I finally have a job with a nice boss (which is huge), I finally have the child I’ve always wanted (after struggling through infertility) and we live comfortably. I do still feel that I have a lot to learn, I’ll never stop learning, but as I get older I make less mistakes, hopefully, and build more of the life that I want. One thing I feel I am still working on a lot is managing my time and everything that has to be done with the demands of motherhood. I feel frustrated sometimes falling asleep too early with my child when I have all this stuff to be done, but maybe it’s my body’s way of telling me it’s good to have a rest too!
What has been your greatest achievement since turning forty?
I think I’m proud of the blogging side of my life, and all the work that has gone into it, and the events that we have done and the people we have connected.
I’m proud of handling the toddlers in my care, and giving them the love that they need. Plus all the art works that I have to produce on a daily basis!
I’m proud of my family and the little boy who is growing up every day. He is my greatest joy.
Now, as a mature woman, do you have any regrets? Anything you wish you could go back and do differently?
I do regret not going to a fertility clinic earlier. I wish I had not wasted time with gynecologists who did not help. But having said this I have to believe that everything has happened at the right time for me.
If you could talk to your 20 or 30 something self, what would be one piece of advice you’d give yourself.
The more relaxed and comfortable you are in your own skin, the more you give permission for others to be themselves too. Stop trying to please people so much and be yourself more. On the other hand, know when to compromise.
What has been one/some of the biggest changes you’ve noticed within yourself since turning forty?
I think I’m trying to be kinder to myself. I notice mistakes and observe them but I don’t beat myself up so much about them anymore.
What do you still hope to achieve in your forties?
I really want to continue to work on my blogging and connecting bloggers. I want to improve my teaching skills and creativity in art and craft activities.
But probably most of all I want make the time with my family count, by being a better mom, a gentle mom, and a good example (and not yelling so much!) I want to draw closer to God and allow Him to make me a better version of myself.
What advice would you give to women who are fearful about approaching forty?
There is nothing to be afraid of if you don’t place value in appearance. As you get older and more comfortable with yourself this is actually a better place to be. More established and more sure of what you want.
What is one of societies stereotypes about women in their forties that you wish you could change?
Probably society’s obsession with looks over intelligence. But I don’t see that changing.
Any parting thoughts or comments?
Forty is fun! I’ve probably been out at more events in my forties, connected with more women (through the shared bond of parenthood, blogging and church) and found more things that bring me joy.
Thank you Heather for participating. I really love how unashamedly authentic you are! Keep being amazing! xx
Are you fierce, fearless, fabulous and in your forties? Would you like to be featured in this series? Then drop me an email!