*hold me…. I’m scared*

On Saturday, while Walter & I were preparing for some visitors, Walter casually asked me if I’d like to fly to Cape Town to visit my family and friends before I head back to work at the end of August. Of course, I jumped at the chance, said yes immediately and before I could even give his offer much thought, we’d booked tickets and advised Ava’s school of her planned absence for the next 10 days.

Its only now, just a couple of days before we’re scheduled to leave that I’m suddenly terrified of the prospect of going away without my husband for 10 days… alone… with TWO children! What was I thinking??? How stupid am I???

And what brought on my sudden fear? Why an utterly shyte night sleep, actually the NO sleep I got last night!

We have ALL been sick! It’s been coughing and snotting for almost a week in the VW household. It’s been delightful! <sarcasm font> In true Walter style, he has upped the volume on his snoring while sick and nearly driven me to commit murder. I cannot tell you the fantasies I’ve had of stuffing a sock in his gaping, snoring mouth and then covering his face with a pillow & forcefully holding it in place till her jerks and gasps his last freaking snoring breath the last few nights. Last night, out of desperation, I sent him to sleep in the guest room upstairs. Aside from the fact that I can’t sleep due to the increased volume of his chainsaw, I was afraid he was going to wake the girls up. The bliksem got a full uninterrupted nights sleep while I padded the passage last night.

The fun started at around 1am when Ava came to stand next to me and tell me she couldn’t sleep. From 1am till 3am I walked her back to her bed about 10 times. Turned off her light, whispered between gritted teeth about what punishment I was going to dish out if she woke Hannah up, packed he toys away, switched off her music. Eventually I explained to her in no uncertain terms what a hiding is (she’s never had a hiding) and how my mom would give me a hiding with a belt or wooden spoon when I was a little girl and how I was going to give her a hiding if she came out her room once more. The look of horror on her face when I explained how I would lean over my bed so my mom could spank me with a belt/slipper/wooden spoon seemed to do the trick and she fell back asleep just after 3am.

Que Hannah! I was then up and down for Hannah between 3am & 5am.

I’d just gotten back into bed when Walter came slinking into our room to get ready for gym… you have no idea how I fantasized about beating him death with one of his gym takkies. After he left I dosed off and was woken the sounds of my chirpy girls just after 6am. As a side note… HOW can children be so chirpy at Sparrows fart when they’ve been awake half the night?? HOW??

And now I’m going away for 10 days where I will parent my children SOLO, out of their environment, out of their routine and all I keep thinking what an idiot, what was I think in my dumb head when this idea was proposed to me and I thought it was SO great that I jumped at the chance????


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  • Reply desh

    Morning Sharon. I am sure you will be fine at your mom’s home. she will baby sit and you can have a good night sleep. Safe trip!!
    Have fun in CPT and send my regards to Lisa and Bella.

    August 7, 2013 at 8:28 am
  • Reply Natasja

    Oh man, the snoring….I get it. It drives me nuts. I sometimes curl up in the fetal position and cry myself to sleep instead of actually stuffing the sock into his mouth. Good luck with the trip!

    August 7, 2013 at 8:49 am
  • Reply Robyn

    WAAAAHAHAHA! I’m sure it wasn’t funny last night but I’m imagining you giving Ava the hiding speech and sorry, that’s HILARIOUS! CPT will be FINE! Hey, at least there won’t be snoring??!! LOL!!

    August 7, 2013 at 9:16 am
  • Reply Tania

    I think Walter was very clever! LOL He got to give you a “gift” of going away to visit family for a few days, and now he is “single”, although he will miss you all, it’s plenty of ME time for him. Clever Lad I’d say!

    August 7, 2013 at 9:29 am
  • Reply Tranquil Body Treats

    Oh my hat, you make me laugh. You’ll be fine and the kids will be fine. I think the trip will do you all the world of good. Enjoy and I do hope that I get to see you and the kids.xoxo

    August 7, 2013 at 5:21 pm
  • Reply Natalie

    If your mom reads your blog – esp the comments – and sees you referring to her as “old” she might just whip out that slipper or wooden spoon or belt and give you the hiding you asking for! My mom always told me “you are never too old for a hiding!” I’m sure everything is going to be fine Shar!

    August 7, 2013 at 6:16 pm
  • Reply Ailsa Jean Loudon

    Oh shame! lol!

    August 7, 2013 at 10:11 pm
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