So today we had embryo transfer, I think it went well but of course we’ll know just how well when we get to test date! Our embryology meeting went well, in hind sight, I’m thankful that the lab did thaw both straws of embryo’s because as of 7h15 this am, of the 7 thawed, 2 had arrested, 2 had shown division but were starting to show signs of fragmentation, one was compacting and two were at the 8 cell stage. All 3 Dr’s concurred that the quality of the last 3 was excellent, in their words, they look as good as fresh embryo’s, so lets hope the chances are just as good. I wanted to transfer the ones that were showing fragmentation but Dr V convinced me otherwise, not sure why I listen to them really ( πŸ˜‰ ) but apparently the quality of the 3 really good ones was good to the point that they refused to transfer more and take a chance with the other two.

The actual transfer went off ok, I have a tilted and very long cervix, so its quite uncomfortable having the speculum pushed around and my cervix pulled to get into my uterus, but I guess its a small price to pay and apparently the long cervix bodes well for pregnancy so I’m not complaining. While I was lying there, legs in the stirrups, all strapped up with one Dr fiddling around down there, while a lab technician hung about with my embryo’s loaded in the catheter and another nurse pressed very hard on my abdomen with the scan, while I lay there feeling very exposed, I couldn’t help but think back on a forum posting I’d read the previous day, somebody asking how sore a specific procedure was and if it was worse than a pap smear as she was concerned about the pain and not wanting to stress herself out. It was another reminder of how its all so relative really and the further you travel down this road, the higher your tolerance for all things painful and stressful becomes. Seven years ago, a pap smear made me nervous as well, now it seems completely insignificant in comparison to some of the things I’ve experienced since embarking on this journey.

So now we wait and pray and wait and pray some more for those little embryo’s. I am already slightly stressed just by viewing the size of the Gestone needle, its HUGE in comparison to the stimming injections and I’m really worried about the administration. I know a few of my special friends have offered to do it for me, but I think I’d feel more comfortable either trying to pretzel myself into a position to do it myself or have a professional do it for me, especially now that I’ve seen the size of the needle. Also, from the explanation I had this morning, the needle needs to go right into the muscle of the bum so its not going to be a whole lot of fun.

So for now I’m feeling positive, theoretically, pregnant with triplets until the blood test proves otherwise. I guess that’s the hardest part of an IVF in comparison to other treatments, knowing that I am technically pregnant now, and hoping and praying that those little beans hatch and attach.

The worst part starts now, the hoping and praying and wondering and feeling positive followed by feeling negative and fighting the desire to POAS!

Wish me luck!