The Stupidest Thing I Ever Said…

We’re into week 3 of teeth cutting. The cutting of the second & third teeth is far worse than the first one. The first one saw Ava being a little bit grumpy, a bit of sleep interruption and a runny tummy and then the offending tooth was there.

Teeth 2; 3 and potentially no. 4 are not giving her an easy time at all, the past week has been hell. We have slept 2 nights out of 7. I have medicated and not even the medication is helping her, last night not even Stopyane could stop the crying or get her to sleep. I have been awake since 01h40, in essence, I’ve already had a 9 hour day but my work day has only just started.

In the midst of the crying – hers and mine, somewhere around 4am this morning, I was reminded of one of the stupidest things I have ever said! I actually cringe with embarrassment when I think about it.

In November last year, we had Miley (my female Chihuahua) spayed and she had a very bad reaction to the surgery, we spent one very sleepless night dealing with her reaction, at the time I compared it to what it must be like to have a human baby and how it was good practice for when we have a baby one day. It’s not the first or the only time, in my pre-parental role, that I had made comparison’s between being a pet owner and being a parent.

I feel like such a douche bag when I think about that now. I wonder how many of my fertile friends must have been having a good giggle at me. The truth is, I had no concept of what sleep deprivation was till I became a parent. Dealing with a sick dog is like a cake walk in comparison to dealing with a sick baby. The two are so far from being similar its laughable.

I suppose I’m not alone in this, at least, I hope not! I don’t think any of us can ever be fully prepared for what parenthood would involve until we’re in it. And while I thought I knew what was in store for me, my imaginings don’t even come close to the reality of the situation.

The part that makes me want to fall to my knees, cover my face with my hands and sob, is when other parents try to offer Walter and I comfort by telling us that once the teething is over, all will return to normal.

DUDES…. in all likelihood, that bit of gut-wrenching-make-you-want-to-blow-your-brains-out information means that in essence, we have another 15 months of sleep deprivation hell ahead of us! YAY!

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  • Reply skrambled

    You are right, I don’t think there is much that can prepare you. 15 more months…OUCH!!!

    September 16, 2010 at 9:56 am
  • Reply vroutjie

    Hehe, you make me laugh! You’ll get through it although you might think you won’t!

    Good luck!

    September 16, 2010 at 10:27 am
    • Reply Sharon

      Its not a question of whether I’ll make it or not, its a question of whether I want to make it… right now I’m begging for mercy……..

      September 16, 2010 at 10:32 am
  • Reply Hanneke C

    I sympathize, but can’t help but ‘smile’ at your constant changing view of parenting! Believe me when I say that my view keeps changing. I look back (very easy to do I know) at those years and think in hindsight that life was soo simple even though I didn’t think so at the time. Hang in there! Not sure how long for but keep up the AWESOME work as a mum (and dad)!

    September 16, 2010 at 10:43 am
    • Reply Sharon

      Yup! Everyone kept telling me that when it comes to raising children, just when you think you’ve got it down pat, they’ll throw you a curve ball & oh boy, are we dealing with a curve ball. We’ve had it SO easy for the past 6 months that this change is totally unfathomable for either of us. I’ve started to feel that our 6 months of bliss was actually to our own detriment. I’m quite sure that if we’d not had an easy-sleeps-through-the-night-never-cries baby this probably wouldn’t seem to bad because its “normal” for some parents but its so extreme in comparison to what we’re used to that we’re both shell shocked! I have loads of friends who tell me how their babies literally just popped teeth out, but then they’re also dealing with babies who never sleep through, so it probably does just seem like teeth are just popping out. KWIM?

      September 16, 2010 at 10:48 am
  • Reply Nisey

    Sharon we had 3 months of zero sleep. luckily heine and i took turns, two nights each so the other at least didn’t have to get out of bed although sleep was NOT possible at all. I have no advice. all i know is that somehow he started sleeping through. we did controlled crying which is fine for regular sleep problems but ava is teething and ‘ill’ so she wants her mommy and leaving her to cry really isn’t an option is it?

    this too shall pass. i know, because i went through it and it passed.

    actually i do have some advice. Rescue (drops only) and red bull…

    September 16, 2010 at 12:45 pm
  • Reply Nisey

    p.s. rescue and red bull are both for your consumption NOT ava’s πŸ˜‰

    September 16, 2010 at 12:46 pm
  • Reply lolly

    I can so relate! Its always the “easy” babies that teethe the worst!
    Jess was identical! Luckily she only cut her first tooth, 2 weeks before she was 1. Her teething was horrendous! She ate lots of yoghurt, and ice-lollies really helped. Made then with fruit juice.

    As for not sleeping, try the Pegasus Sleep 30ch. It knocks jack out and he’s never slept!

    September 16, 2010 at 1:06 pm
  • Reply tzipieastwest

    Phh Sharon. No advise at all just wanting to send you some strength !

    September 16, 2010 at 1:17 pm
  • Reply ksmind

    I’m smiling at your honesty (as always) as I too can relate to that douche bag feeling!! My older sister had her kids a decade ahead of me and oh boy, was I full of assvice, comments, suggestions etc etc.. I have apologized and we have laughed about it many times.. (she never called me on it at the time).. and that’s the thing about the “mothers club” [sorry if this offends anyone] but often when you are a mother you realise there is no use in pointing out to people that for example, they have no idea what sleep deprivation is! .. cos what’s the point really – you just come off looking like you want to be superior and martyrish etc.. better to smile inwardly and just know that they too will learn the hard way – just like you did πŸ˜‰

    September 16, 2010 at 1:21 pm
    • Reply Sharon

      Too true Kelly! I was so full of opinions about what I would and wouldn’t do before becoming a mother, almost all of those things have flown out the window, right now, we’re in survival mode, so if putting Ava in front of the TV while she eats her dinner gets he to eat, then I do it! If holding her and rocking her and *gasp* putting her in bed with me gets her to settle, then I do it because I’m still a person at the end of the day, a very tired, broken person just doing my best to get us all through this very trying time. And seriously, there is no way to sugar coat just how hard this is. If I take my wildest imaginings and multiply it by 50 it still doesn’t come close and I know some of my IF sisters have probably read this and thought that I should shut the f*#@& up and enjoy my blessing and I don’t mean to come off as sounding ungrateful ‘cos, God knows, I wouldn’t want to go back to being childless, its just that one can never be prepared for just how hard this is!

      September 16, 2010 at 1:26 pm
      • Reply ksmind

        Just do what you have to do girl! (anyone who judges that hasn’t been to where you are! it really is that simple..) Sending ‘survival’ vibes xxx

        September 16, 2010 at 2:46 pm
  • Reply thebsdiaries

    shit she really is not coping with these teeth is she? i am sure a million people have offered advice (isn’t that a sinead song.. anyway) Hylands homeopathic teething tablets – i pumped these into my kid and i swear they made a difference. if you haven’t tried them, give it a bash – at dischem or pharmacies. i fed these to my son every day for two years – and he really didn’t even get a runny bum while pushing out all his teeth in 12 months. but then every baby is different but then at this stage everything is worth a try!

    September 16, 2010 at 1:27 pm
    • Reply Sharon

      Jen, I will try ANYTHING! I don’t go in for all the new-agey-shoo-waa stuff but guess what my kid has wrapped around her neck?? A 100% Baltic Amber teething necklace!
      I’ll try ANYTHING, she *read we* all need the relief!

      September 16, 2010 at 1:29 pm
  • Reply hanneke001

    Shame hun, i have no advise or anything just wanted to say. GL for what its worth !

    September 16, 2010 at 2:24 pm
  • Reply little29

    I love your honesty!! and yip you look back at your “BC” (before children) years and now its like your life as you know it has undergone a paradigm shift – its funny I was the last out of all my close friends to have children and remember all the things that used to irritate me – like them calling me on a weekend before 10am as i would still be sleeping – now my friends kids are much older, they now get to sleep in and I am the one up at sparrows fart calling them at 6.10am asking if they would like to come for a braai later…and for whatever reason possesses them -my family and friends insist on calling me during happy hour (5pm to 7pm) WTF dudes!! – dont you know I have screaming, over stimulated children, food being spat and thrown around, bathroom flooded, crappy nappies – does it actually sound like I can chat right now huh???

    September 16, 2010 at 9:24 pm
  • Reply reluctantmom

    I am really laughing with you …. and then laughing at you …. and then laughing at you some more …. oh dear ….. as bad as it is, it does get better …. then it gets worse …. but it does all get better in degrees … or it just feels like that because you are able to handle more. You will forever live in the world of “I just wish I could get just a little bit more sleep” …. but on the bright side …. she is not going to cry when her second teeth come in …. you might …. but she won’t.

    You do make me laugh (but in a good way)! xxx

    September 16, 2010 at 9:26 pm
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