On Women’s Day, What Being Fierce, Fearless & Fabulous Means To Me

Earlier this week, I sent out an email to subscribers of my blog, asking for participants in the fierce, fearless, fabulous, forty feature.

The response?

Left me a little astounded. And not in a good way.

I’m not fearless….

I’m not fabulous….

I am fat…..

I’m unattractive

My life is falling apart

I’m boring

So, on Women’s Day, I wanted to set the record straight. I want to tell you what being fierce, fearless, fabulous and forty means.

So, my darlings, come over here and let me fix your crown because you’ve got it all wrong.

What being fierce, fearless and fabulous isn’t…

It has NOTHING to do with how you look. NOTHING. It is not about being pretty, being thin or being perfectly packaged. It has nothing to do with glamour.

It has nothing to do with living a glamorous life.

So what is being fierce, fearless, fabulous & forty?

It’s a celebration of you. Your essence. It’s you in all your perfect imperfection. It is you standing up and saying look at me, I was crushed by the challenges of life, but, like a Phoenix, I rose from the ashes and I conquered. I overcame. I am STILL here, I may be bleeding and bruised, but I am moving forward.

Let’s talk about being fierce…

Being fierce to me is knowing who you are and being ok with it. Perfect? No? But aware of your flaws and your shortcomings and being able to live with it, without excuse. It’s embracing being a work in progress and doing the work to make the progress. It’s making NO apologies for who you are, not to anyone. It’s being confident in your ideas and even if they’re unpopular, moving forward anyway. It’s not worrying about what other people think. Because in this life, ain’t nobody got time for that!

Being fearless…

Is being shit scared but doing it anyway! Hell, if I look at myself as an example of being fearless, I’m fearful about a lot of things, but that’s how I conquer them. I used to have a debilitating fear of flying, but I conquered it! How? By doing it anyway.

I was scared of what people would think about a forty something year old women taking horse riding lessons. But I wanted to do it, so I did it anyway. I’m scared of jumping on my horse after a horrific experience as a child, but guess what? I’m doing it anyway.  I’m scared of being laughed at at the jumping show on Sunday because I will be the adult rider riding the trotting poles with the children. But guess what? I’m doing it anyway.

I’m scared of my new job. I’m scared of leaving what I’ve know for the past 12+ years. But I’m doing it anyway, because there can be know growth without fear, without discomfort. 

Everyone is scared. But we can’t move forward in life unless we conquer that fear and THAT is what being fearless is. Being afraid, but doing it anyway.

On being fabulous….

Queens, all I can say is that being fabulous is 50% internal dialogue and 50% faking it till you make it. It’s about telling yourself you are fabulous. It’s about feeling fabulous about being fearless and fierce. It’s about embracing your imperfections and realising those very imperfections are part of what make you fabulous. It’s about waking up each morning and telling yourself you are fabulous! It’s about seeing your flaws, every line, every wrinkle, every scar and knowing those very things make you fabulous because they make  you REAL!

On being forty…

I’m 45 and all I can say is, what a decade this is turning out to be. I feel empowered. I feel free. I feel the most authentically myself I have ever been. I feel like I have the power to break stereotypes, I feel like I am fabulous and relevant and my give-a-*^%$-meter is set at a default of ZERO! 

Being forty means your search for identity is over. You’re it. You’re here, it’s now the time to embrace all of you. Send a letter to you 20 & 30 year old self and tell that woman, it’s going to be ok. It’s going to be more than ok. It’s going to be fabulous. All the stupid shit you worried about in your 20’s and 30’s will seem small and irrelevant when you arrive here. 

And lastly, share your story! 

No matter how mundane you may think your life is, I promise you this, it is not. It is extraordinary. It is your life and your story and it is worth sharing. 

Your story has the power to inspire. It has the power to touch someone’s life. It has the power to encourage and to motivate. Whether you’re a high flying executive or a stay at home mom, a jet setter or land plodder, you have the power to inspire.

So be empowered!

This feature has become such a labour of love for me. So many women have reached out and shared their stories, so many women have contacted me and told me what your stories mean to them. How these stories have touched and inspired them. How these stories have resonated.

Even Essentials Magazine have taken note of this feature and I want to carry on with it, but I need your stories to be able to do so.

How to get featured:

Follow this link, you’ll find all the interview here as well as the requirements and how to get it off to me. 

Now straighten that crown and be fabulous! 



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